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Swimming Through My Grief
It’s the time of year when I participate in an open water swim to raise $$’s for cancer research through an organization called Swim Across America. When I signed up the first time, I did it for the experience of trying something new and a way to connect with our larger community.
However, over the past ten years, it has turned into something very personal for me; the opportunity to swim through my grief.
Let me explain. The first couple of years I started writing a few names on my back of people I knew who had courageously fought cancer. As the years went by, I kept adding names to my back and sadly every year there was another person from our church, school or neighborhood who we had lost to cancer. I had prayed with many of them as they faced their cancer journey one treatment, one challenge and one victory at a time. It was a lot to carry and I needed to give it to God.
As people began to hear about my swim, they wanted to REMEMBER those they had lost and others wanted to HONOR those who had made it through chemo/radiation and lived! The lists on my back kept getting longer. As I swim, I have the opportunity to pray for the families represented on my back and thank God for the lives of those we have lost, as well as those who are living cancer free. With each stroke, I pray for continued healing, strength and courage for their specific journey. The mile swim goes by quickly as my mind and heart are focused in prayer lifting up each name on my back before God’s throne of grace.
At the end of the swim, over 500 swimmers listen to the latest research and updates of the work being done at Fred Hutch/Seattle Cancer Care Alliance to save lives. We celebrate the privilege of taking a morning out of our lives to raise $$’s for such an important cause. My soul is a little lighter knowing that I am able to swim through my own grief by giving others an opportunity to experience theirs as well.
Jesus promised, “Blessed are those who grieve, for they will be comforted.” Matthew 5:4
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Leaping for Joy
Last month I had the privilege of going on a retreat with the women from my church at one of my favorite camps not far from Mount Rainier. For the past ten summers we have dropped our kids off at this camp for a week of adventure, faith and fun! We also participated in their family camp for several years over Labor Day weekend and enjoyed making special memories together with friends.
On Saturday afternoon of our retreat, I had planned to spend my free time in the sauna with a group of friends, but God was wooing me onto the water for a paddle with Him. So I decided to take a canoe out by myself for a paddle with my creator basking in His creation. Perhaps I would find the beaver and his dam that we had often seen over the years or maybe the beautiful flight of an eagle coming off of her perch. As I paddled on the glass lake, I could see the reflection of the forest surrounding me.
God was reminding me of his deep love for me as his breathtaking creation was all around me. When I arrived at the former spot of the beaver’s dam, he was not there. Then I looked up and heard a flock of Canadian geese taking off across the water. They were flying in peaceful unison, confident of their destination.
As I was heading back, something caught my eye my on the shore. To my surprise, I saw several deer up in the woods. But what happened next was exhilarating. One of the does began leaping through the forest brush and she didn’t stop. For several minutes I watched her leap for joy across the banks along the shore. I smiled to myself and thanked God for this special surprise. As I pondered this gift for the days that followed, I found this section of Scripture in Isaiah 35 entitled,
“Joy of the Redeemed”
3“Strengthen the feeble hands,
steady the knees that give way;4 say to those with fearful hearts,
“Be strong, do not fear;
your God will come,
he will come with vengeance;
with divine retribution
he will come to save you.”5 Then will the eyes of the blind be opened
and the ears of the deaf unstopped.6 Then the lame will leap like a deer,
and the mute tongue shout for joy.
Water will gush forth in the wilderness
and streams in the desert.7 The burning sand will become a pool,
the thirsty ground bubbling springs.
In the haunts where jackals once lay,
grass and reeds and papyrus will grow.We don’t have to look far to find pain and injustice in our world today. These verses are a beautiful reminder that God brings hope in the midst of despair, healing into brokenness and his powerful strength into our places of greatest weakness. Isaiah is prophesying about all that the coming messiah Jesus would accomplish through his death and resurrection. Also, in the following chapters we see how the prophet Isaiah and King Hezekiah trust God to powerfully defeat their arch enemy, the Assyrians. With God ALL things are possible! Will you claim these promises with me today and join me in leaping for joy?
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An Advent Invitation
It’s that time of year again….the Christmas music has begun and our neighborhood is sparkling with lights. There are outward signs all around us but how are you doing on the inside as we head into the “happiest time of the year”? All of us carry different “emotional luggage”.
For some it is a handbag of joy…. You are grateful for your life and your heart is filled with joy and you are excited to celebrate your favorite upcoming traditions. Some of you may be carrying a heavy suitcase of caregiving as you are regularly caring for loved ones and it is getting harder to lift. Perhaps you have a backpack of regret and wish things could be different. Some of you may have a sparkly purse of anticipation looking forward to seeing family and special friends in the upcoming weeks. Or maybe you are carrying a fanny pack of worry and you are wondering how you are going to afford all that is expected for Christmas this year.
Whatever you are carrying…. This is an opportunity to set it down and be still in God’s presence and receive an invitation from Jesus. He says,
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:28-30
I would like you to consider how you can prepare your heart for what is coming. I encourage you to reframe the way you think about the upcoming holiday season. For Christians around the world, the four weeks leading up to Christmas is called Advent and anticipates both the birth of Jesus and his eventual second coming. The word “advent” refers to a coming, an arrival, or the beginning of something new.
As Isaiah was prophesying about the coming of Jesus he said this, “See, I am doing a new thing. Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the wilderness and streams in the wasteland.”Isaiah 43:19
That’s what Jesus does in our lives. Through his death and resurrection, He gives us a “restart” a chance to begin again, a clean slate, a new direction….a way in the wilderness.
God wants to do “a new thing” in our lives this Advent season. He is inviting you to sing a “new song” through His power. As David wrote in Psalm 40:3, “He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God.”
As Advent begins today, I invite you to intentionally set down the luggage you are carrying at the feet of Jesus and accept His invitation to be filled with peace and allow Him to give you a “restart” each day as you prepare for his birth.
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“The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.”
– St. Augustine
